Rules of the Barn

I borrowed these from another blog I read (http://risingrainbow.blogspot.com/), they were too funny not to share. I have added my own at the bottom, feel free to comment and add your own.



1. I am human. You are horse. What I say goes. Please take that into consideration when you are standing on my foot.



2. Spilled grain is not "fair game", especially when it is spilled in another horse's stall. It still belongs to that particular horse. You have no reason to go in and eat it.



3. Poop does not need to be hidden. I clean your stall every day. I will Find it. Do not hide it.



4. I do not need your help when I clean the barn, nor do I need your supervision, or even your presence. I have been cleaning the barn and stalls ever since you lived here. I know what I am doing. Standing at the door staring at me, will not make me clean faster.



5. There is no need to go into the barn and help yourself to the feed. Meals Are given at specific times of the day -am and pm. There is a feed schedule. You know the schedule. I know you know the schedule. You know that I know that you know the schedule. There is no need to help yourself.



6. Water buckets are not toys. Neither is the gate, pitchfork, wheel barrow, whatever is in the wheel barrow, fence,or the occasional dog.



7. The wheel barrow is there for a reason. Please do not try to move it while I am cleaning your stall.



8. Just because I go into the Barn doesn't mean you automatically get food. There is other stuff in the barn. Stuff you don't want. Like de wormer and fly spray , shots, medicine.



9. Sheath cleaning will NOT be enjoyed...by anyone.



10. Water travels through the hose. If you are thirsty, do not stand on the hose. The water buckets will fill much faster.



11. Not everything has to be high drama. None of the following things will kill you: fly spray, plastic bags, balloons, hoses, chipmunks and other small rodents, or bright blue tarps.



12. Although I understand the need for you to go to the bathroom, it is not necessary to hold it in all day until the moment I finish cleaning you r stall and put away the wheel barrow.



13. Accidents happen. However, I'm not altogether sure you're not trying to kill yourself. Next time you decide to impale yourself on some sort of object, please try to do it when it's not hailing, midnight, the weekend, or Christmas.



14. While I appreciate your need to be clean, pooping in your water bucket does not make my job easier, and it deprives you of water. Please find a new spot.



15. Whinnying as loudly as you can in my face does not make me feed you any faster.



16. I have to wait patiently too while you are having your shoes tacked on. There is no need to bite me.



I added:



17. Stallions: there is no need to call out to EVERY horse that walks by your stall. If you must, please limit it to only horses of the opposite sex, not during lesson time, not when I am leading a horse by (or any students, boarders, owners, etc.), not during feed time, not when the mare is in heat, not to Blondie (she's already pregnant), and not Promise (your mom). OR, just don't do it. Ever.



18. Your consideration is appreciated during farm tours for prospective students, boarders, and training clients. Do not feel the need to run away from me when I try to catch you, pin your ears, or swish your tail at me. Bucking and broncing during this time should be kept to a minimum.



19. Going bananas in your stall doesn't impress me.



20. I don't know how you manage to escape from your stall, but it seems that once a year there is an episode. Should you escape from your stall, please remain calm. There is no need to rip blankets down from their hanging places and poop on them, or to help free your friends.